Queer Teen: A Loser’s Diary
A/N: First of all, I wrote this when I was 15 years old. I didn’t know how to write yet then and I have to say that word play here is very, very weak and lame. I did some editions with the punctuations (which were retarded) and a few corrections in the tenses (some were out of place), but otherwise, it remains as it was. I’m posting it here for future reference. 07.30.06
Disclaimer: I don’t own SD boys, Inoue does. The events that follow are not included in the original plot but enjoy anyway.
Summary: Kenji Fujima’s freshman diary exposed! On-going.
--
May 28, Tuesday
First day of senior high. Hot day. School many blocks away from home.
The basketball team of Shoyo is giving away forms to those who are interested in the basketball club. I joined of course; some of the cutest kids are talking about it and I couldn’t help asking this tall, handsome kid with eyeglasses. He said he played center during his junior days and damn, wasn’t I captain last year? I was, and I didn’t get any award so what’s the use of flaunting my title to him? Hadn’t it been for that brat Mitsui Hisashi I could’ve strutted around and…Uh, I’m forgetting about Maki…some popular schools were trying and dying to get him, and Mitsui too! Darn, and when did they land? Kainan and Shohoku! Kainan’s a good school, been winning since I was born. But Shohoku…uh, that’s where all the bummers go. And the MVP chose to be in it…another loser. All the same, still bothers me; why would these big time ballers go for such schools when very few good-looking guys are attending them? Ah. Can’t understand their moods at all. Anyway, I’m lucky to be free to go anywhere, at least for a high cause; a school with a storm of studs and a damn good basketball team, who wouldn’t want to be counted in? Oh, I almost missed our assistant captain; he’s supposed to be cute, another motivation for a new kid like me…well diary, that’s all for today. Bye.
May 29, Wednesday
Second day. Another sweltering day.
Have I mentioned anything about this guy with the eyeglasses? Oh yeah, I think I have ‘cos I couldn’t sleep last night after I had this dream (nightmare) about him making it to the team and me messing up that fast break and hence ending up a reject. Such a long night. Anyway, we just bumped into each other again and weren’t quite able to get away from a short drink at the cafeteria. We both had to extend our courtesy as we’re soon to be team mates. If we’re lucky. He said he used to be team captain too so great expectations are set around him. I replied I was a candidate for captain last year and to my surprise, so was he…and Maki and Uozomi and a damn lot also. He mentioned as well that the team owner of Shoyo almost kneeled in front of him just for him to enroll his ass here (I didn’t say the crackpot imbecile almost kissed my polished toenails for the hell of it; wouldn’t want to rain on his parade). I just nodded as if to say I got it. Just then the bell rang. I took the last sip at my Iced Mocha, which was too sweet it almost had me diagnosed with fucking diabetes. We both ascended to the 6th floor of the accursed building and went inside for our first class (my section is 1-1, him 1-4). My last class which was first year algebra ended at 3:15 and as usual a girl came up to me to shake hands. Yeah, I’m real. You wanna touch me too? I almost blurted out. I don’t know what she was really up to. Or was she just trying to be close to a junior high superstar? Typical. I’m guessing she would’ve asked for more than a handshake if I didn’t say goodbye the moment she started introducing herself. But however that may be, I’m quite used to girls doing things like that. I got a full blast of it in my junior days and some did go as far as asking me to spend the day with them. For god’s sake. I prefer…never mind. I haven’t tried saying yes, for your information, because that would amount to missing a practice session, which is a rare thing for me to do. I’d really rather be on court rehearsing my smooth moves on the floor. I’m not really offended by things like that. If anything, it could be an ego-booster sometimes. But sometimes, they just get on my nerves and arggh…I don’t like giggling girls that much either. Anyway, I went home alone ‘cos I couldn’t wait to practice my long-range at our backyard. Tomorrow’s going to be a great day because try-outs are on and I’ve just got to give everyone in that damned court what I have. Especially that Toru Hanagata who highly expects that he’s going to be a starter.
May 30, Thursday
Third day. Another sunny day. TRY-OUT FOR THE CLUB!!!
This has gotta be the happiest day of my life. It’s so amazing I’m finding it hard to absorb everything. Anyways, I’m writing down every detail of what took place from the moment I woke up at 6:15 in the morning because this day deserves a long entry. I took a shower for 15 minutes, brushed m teeth and after that wore my school uniform and sprayed off my favorite perfume. I reached school at 7:20, heavy with breakfast and all. At least I was able to attend my first and second to the last classes, from Japanese literature to algebra. I headed straight to the stadium, almost jumping my way there. It was around 2:30 and the gym, I’m telling you, was jammed with more girls than I ever imagined. Some boys were looking funny and pale in their very short shorts. They were there for the same reason that I was. I immediately changed into my basketball attire and just as the captain blew his whistle, I was done tying my Asics sneakers. He quickly commanded us to form a line. Since I was the shortest, I went first. After everything was good and ready, it was time to make ourselves known. I said, ‘Fujima Kenji, 163 cm, 48 kg and captain of Fumikaro High last year. I play both the shooting guard and point guard position. My goals are to win the National Tournament and to top the prefecture as this year’s best rookie.’ I finished loudly. Strange glances were thrown at me after this monologue, but I don’t really give a damn whatever these petty people think. All I was aware of was that a proud smile slanted across our team captain’s face and that’s enough to prove my competence. The game started at 2:45. I was in the white team and had to group up with this big guy Kazushi. He was also captain of his former team, according to him, but I guess they didn’t do that well otherwise I would’ve heard he matched up quite well with Mitsui, you know, the MVP. Anyway, there were 16 freshmen on the list, originally, and only 10 were starting out; the rest would be substitutes. Toru was on the green team, I think, to even the match. His looks easily told me that he was going to smash that basket to show how tough he is. I just smiled to say that I was going to make the most amazing, unblockable shots they’d ever witness. The first half was pretty uneventful. It ended with our team up by 4; score was 49-45. This, I observed, was a tight one. Each team was a defensive and offensive Triple Crown winner. Every time one of us got the steal we would go for a successful fast break. Every time they had it, one of them would make a long range and for the tall ones, even a dunk! Show-offs! That is why I say the game was a really close one. The team leaders seemed to have difficulties in qualifying the freshmen; nearly everyone did great. But they did favor teams though. Our captain, judging by his jubilant cheering, was on our side whereas his assistant was clearly on Toru’s, which spoiled my moment because all the time his eyes were locked on Toru’s movements and it just gives me clarification that he’s intensely into Toru and that he could make his advances anytime after the stupid ballgame and eventually he wouldn’t be mine and…but there are undoubtedly other stuff to worry about than sulking around in my jealousy and scheming how to lure a cute assistant captain. The second half began at around 3:15. I was carefully keeping track of time for a reason. As early as the game was, I already knocked down a total of 20, a little less than the score of my team mates put together. Other than that, I dropped in 8 assists, a couple of boards and best of it was my game high of 5 steals. The coach said that if I carried on I could break a school record but I didn’t keep my hopes up that much. My mind was elsewhere, really. Anyway I did it all in a matter of 20 minutes, isn’t it marvelous? I even felt certain at that moment that I was going to be a starting guard. The first freshman in Shoyo’s history to debut as a lead-scoring starter. Sounds nice. Anyway, the team was 53 percent from the field while the opponent was 58 percent, which suggested that our team had more possessions but more misses. Not good but as long as the lead was ours, we would be fine. Toru’s team had obviously more violations and fouls which caused our team to be awarded with penalty shots and other opportunities. The second half wasn’t a one-sided battle because the lead shifted from one team to the other every minute. Toru must have done a well sermon to his pals and I believe I did a job of encouraging mine for my part. The last minutes were the most crucial because the opponents were only trailed by 3 baskets, 6 points. The pressure was pounded harder on us when this little kid who wore jersey number 18 hit a 40 footer in the last one minute and 47 seconds! It cut our point advantage to three which prompted me to call for a timeout. Later when we got back on the floor with 1:40 on the clock, I asked Kazushi to stay outside the paint and be wary within the 15 footer area because the green team would surely anticipate whatever shot he was going to make from there. I let everyone stay outside the 3 point line and scatter themselves in every direction to break through the enemies’ sticky defense. The core of this strategy was to find an open spot where I could drive through the bucket, leaving my opponent behind with a screen from one of my group mates. I told them there was plenty of time and that we weren’t in a hurry so it was OK to eat up time, as long as we could preserve the lead. After all, that was one of the plan’s purposes. I was then the only white team member outside the 3 point line when I found an open path that led to the hoop. My guard was two meters away, being clueless, when the ball was caught by my clutches. Swift as the wind, I passed it back and ran to the foul line area. The area was empty and my guard was trapped by Kazushi. The ball was returned to me and this time it landed in my left hand. I took two steps forward and leaped for a finger-roll. It was in. The score was now 85-84 in our favor, and a look of exasperation was drawn on green team’s faces. I thought I saw a glint in his eye for a split second, that well-see-what-when-we-get-to-the-other-side-of-the-court look. I managed to hand him a grin which I intended to say ‘you’re not scaring the hell out of me,’ we both turned to run then though our stamina bar was now visibly empty. The time left was one minute and ten seconds. They were too mad to catch up that they made a good basket within twelve seconds. Our team’s deal was to stick to our former strategy. But the ball was accidentally tapped away from my team mate within fifty three seconds remaining, which cost another subtraction from our lead by way of another lay-up from the other team. The crowd went wild. They were now down only by a point and just like that our advantage was consumed. 42 now on the clock. I was feeling miserable with apprehension. We were all hot as the sun. Kazushi called a timeout, our final one. We listened to his coaching which sounded like nagging by the way. To be honest, his ideas were brilliant but too professional and ambitious for our elementary level of playing. What we needed in fact was someone who would get under the basket and make a feint. As he took off someone would be ready to catch the ball, which would be thrown in disguise of a shot. The one who caught it must hand it to me fast. This plan of course contained heightened risk of getting fly-swatted, in addition to being presumptuous of the other team’s un-anxious defense. First, we weren’t sure if all or majority of the green team would storm at the guy who would do the fake. Second, if the guy got delayed, he would sure be charged with a five second violation. Lastly, if anyone from theother squad got wind of it and got me, I assuredly wouldn’t be able to make that shot. They would grab the rebound because our team was simply lesser in terms of offensive rebounds and thus, the possibility of them scoring again and snatching the lead would be enlarged and they would really take the lead for the first time in who knows how long…but for lack of a better idea, we opted to go on with the plan. Number 16 was assigned for the fake, Kazushi for the pass and me for the shot. Piece of cake it seemed like it, but far out in reality. So we executed the plan. The ball was delivered to me through bare success and dangerous passes. When it was my turn Toru charged at me. That wasn’t expected. There was nothing left to do but for me to do another fake. I aimed, not jumping and to my delight, he bought it! So I funneled again even as he landed. The ball flew from me; the crowd was further excited. I could hear the sound of the ball gunning through the air and with .18 second left with the game, the ball went it. It must have been the most amazing shot I have made in a few months. Then the buzzer rose up in the air. As I received congratulations, I felt that there was something dramatic about this victory. One thing was certain; either I was the best player, or Toru Hanagata who got 2 points more than me. As it turned out, however, it wouldn’t matter either way because both of us made it to the team. Plus, there’s a new challenge in store for us newcomers. We are going to face the basketball team tomorrow and guess what? They promised it wouldn’t be that easy.
TBC
Disclaimer: I don’t own SD boys, Inoue does. The events that follow are not included in the original plot but enjoy anyway.
Summary: Kenji Fujima’s freshman diary exposed! On-going.
--
May 28, Tuesday
First day of senior high. Hot day. School many blocks away from home.
The basketball team of Shoyo is giving away forms to those who are interested in the basketball club. I joined of course; some of the cutest kids are talking about it and I couldn’t help asking this tall, handsome kid with eyeglasses. He said he played center during his junior days and damn, wasn’t I captain last year? I was, and I didn’t get any award so what’s the use of flaunting my title to him? Hadn’t it been for that brat Mitsui Hisashi I could’ve strutted around and…Uh, I’m forgetting about Maki…some popular schools were trying and dying to get him, and Mitsui too! Darn, and when did they land? Kainan and Shohoku! Kainan’s a good school, been winning since I was born. But Shohoku…uh, that’s where all the bummers go. And the MVP chose to be in it…another loser. All the same, still bothers me; why would these big time ballers go for such schools when very few good-looking guys are attending them? Ah. Can’t understand their moods at all. Anyway, I’m lucky to be free to go anywhere, at least for a high cause; a school with a storm of studs and a damn good basketball team, who wouldn’t want to be counted in? Oh, I almost missed our assistant captain; he’s supposed to be cute, another motivation for a new kid like me…well diary, that’s all for today. Bye.
May 29, Wednesday
Second day. Another sweltering day.
Have I mentioned anything about this guy with the eyeglasses? Oh yeah, I think I have ‘cos I couldn’t sleep last night after I had this dream (nightmare) about him making it to the team and me messing up that fast break and hence ending up a reject. Such a long night. Anyway, we just bumped into each other again and weren’t quite able to get away from a short drink at the cafeteria. We both had to extend our courtesy as we’re soon to be team mates. If we’re lucky. He said he used to be team captain too so great expectations are set around him. I replied I was a candidate for captain last year and to my surprise, so was he…and Maki and Uozomi and a damn lot also. He mentioned as well that the team owner of Shoyo almost kneeled in front of him just for him to enroll his ass here (I didn’t say the crackpot imbecile almost kissed my polished toenails for the hell of it; wouldn’t want to rain on his parade). I just nodded as if to say I got it. Just then the bell rang. I took the last sip at my Iced Mocha, which was too sweet it almost had me diagnosed with fucking diabetes. We both ascended to the 6th floor of the accursed building and went inside for our first class (my section is 1-1, him 1-4). My last class which was first year algebra ended at 3:15 and as usual a girl came up to me to shake hands. Yeah, I’m real. You wanna touch me too? I almost blurted out. I don’t know what she was really up to. Or was she just trying to be close to a junior high superstar? Typical. I’m guessing she would’ve asked for more than a handshake if I didn’t say goodbye the moment she started introducing herself. But however that may be, I’m quite used to girls doing things like that. I got a full blast of it in my junior days and some did go as far as asking me to spend the day with them. For god’s sake. I prefer…never mind. I haven’t tried saying yes, for your information, because that would amount to missing a practice session, which is a rare thing for me to do. I’d really rather be on court rehearsing my smooth moves on the floor. I’m not really offended by things like that. If anything, it could be an ego-booster sometimes. But sometimes, they just get on my nerves and arggh…I don’t like giggling girls that much either. Anyway, I went home alone ‘cos I couldn’t wait to practice my long-range at our backyard. Tomorrow’s going to be a great day because try-outs are on and I’ve just got to give everyone in that damned court what I have. Especially that Toru Hanagata who highly expects that he’s going to be a starter.
May 30, Thursday
Third day. Another sunny day. TRY-OUT FOR THE CLUB!!!
This has gotta be the happiest day of my life. It’s so amazing I’m finding it hard to absorb everything. Anyways, I’m writing down every detail of what took place from the moment I woke up at 6:15 in the morning because this day deserves a long entry. I took a shower for 15 minutes, brushed m teeth and after that wore my school uniform and sprayed off my favorite perfume. I reached school at 7:20, heavy with breakfast and all. At least I was able to attend my first and second to the last classes, from Japanese literature to algebra. I headed straight to the stadium, almost jumping my way there. It was around 2:30 and the gym, I’m telling you, was jammed with more girls than I ever imagined. Some boys were looking funny and pale in their very short shorts. They were there for the same reason that I was. I immediately changed into my basketball attire and just as the captain blew his whistle, I was done tying my Asics sneakers. He quickly commanded us to form a line. Since I was the shortest, I went first. After everything was good and ready, it was time to make ourselves known. I said, ‘Fujima Kenji, 163 cm, 48 kg and captain of Fumikaro High last year. I play both the shooting guard and point guard position. My goals are to win the National Tournament and to top the prefecture as this year’s best rookie.’ I finished loudly. Strange glances were thrown at me after this monologue, but I don’t really give a damn whatever these petty people think. All I was aware of was that a proud smile slanted across our team captain’s face and that’s enough to prove my competence. The game started at 2:45. I was in the white team and had to group up with this big guy Kazushi. He was also captain of his former team, according to him, but I guess they didn’t do that well otherwise I would’ve heard he matched up quite well with Mitsui, you know, the MVP. Anyway, there were 16 freshmen on the list, originally, and only 10 were starting out; the rest would be substitutes. Toru was on the green team, I think, to even the match. His looks easily told me that he was going to smash that basket to show how tough he is. I just smiled to say that I was going to make the most amazing, unblockable shots they’d ever witness. The first half was pretty uneventful. It ended with our team up by 4; score was 49-45. This, I observed, was a tight one. Each team was a defensive and offensive Triple Crown winner. Every time one of us got the steal we would go for a successful fast break. Every time they had it, one of them would make a long range and for the tall ones, even a dunk! Show-offs! That is why I say the game was a really close one. The team leaders seemed to have difficulties in qualifying the freshmen; nearly everyone did great. But they did favor teams though. Our captain, judging by his jubilant cheering, was on our side whereas his assistant was clearly on Toru’s, which spoiled my moment because all the time his eyes were locked on Toru’s movements and it just gives me clarification that he’s intensely into Toru and that he could make his advances anytime after the stupid ballgame and eventually he wouldn’t be mine and…but there are undoubtedly other stuff to worry about than sulking around in my jealousy and scheming how to lure a cute assistant captain. The second half began at around 3:15. I was carefully keeping track of time for a reason. As early as the game was, I already knocked down a total of 20, a little less than the score of my team mates put together. Other than that, I dropped in 8 assists, a couple of boards and best of it was my game high of 5 steals. The coach said that if I carried on I could break a school record but I didn’t keep my hopes up that much. My mind was elsewhere, really. Anyway I did it all in a matter of 20 minutes, isn’t it marvelous? I even felt certain at that moment that I was going to be a starting guard. The first freshman in Shoyo’s history to debut as a lead-scoring starter. Sounds nice. Anyway, the team was 53 percent from the field while the opponent was 58 percent, which suggested that our team had more possessions but more misses. Not good but as long as the lead was ours, we would be fine. Toru’s team had obviously more violations and fouls which caused our team to be awarded with penalty shots and other opportunities. The second half wasn’t a one-sided battle because the lead shifted from one team to the other every minute. Toru must have done a well sermon to his pals and I believe I did a job of encouraging mine for my part. The last minutes were the most crucial because the opponents were only trailed by 3 baskets, 6 points. The pressure was pounded harder on us when this little kid who wore jersey number 18 hit a 40 footer in the last one minute and 47 seconds! It cut our point advantage to three which prompted me to call for a timeout. Later when we got back on the floor with 1:40 on the clock, I asked Kazushi to stay outside the paint and be wary within the 15 footer area because the green team would surely anticipate whatever shot he was going to make from there. I let everyone stay outside the 3 point line and scatter themselves in every direction to break through the enemies’ sticky defense. The core of this strategy was to find an open spot where I could drive through the bucket, leaving my opponent behind with a screen from one of my group mates. I told them there was plenty of time and that we weren’t in a hurry so it was OK to eat up time, as long as we could preserve the lead. After all, that was one of the plan’s purposes. I was then the only white team member outside the 3 point line when I found an open path that led to the hoop. My guard was two meters away, being clueless, when the ball was caught by my clutches. Swift as the wind, I passed it back and ran to the foul line area. The area was empty and my guard was trapped by Kazushi. The ball was returned to me and this time it landed in my left hand. I took two steps forward and leaped for a finger-roll. It was in. The score was now 85-84 in our favor, and a look of exasperation was drawn on green team’s faces. I thought I saw a glint in his eye for a split second, that well-see-what-when-we-get-to-the-other-side-of-the-court look. I managed to hand him a grin which I intended to say ‘you’re not scaring the hell out of me,’ we both turned to run then though our stamina bar was now visibly empty. The time left was one minute and ten seconds. They were too mad to catch up that they made a good basket within twelve seconds. Our team’s deal was to stick to our former strategy. But the ball was accidentally tapped away from my team mate within fifty three seconds remaining, which cost another subtraction from our lead by way of another lay-up from the other team. The crowd went wild. They were now down only by a point and just like that our advantage was consumed. 42 now on the clock. I was feeling miserable with apprehension. We were all hot as the sun. Kazushi called a timeout, our final one. We listened to his coaching which sounded like nagging by the way. To be honest, his ideas were brilliant but too professional and ambitious for our elementary level of playing. What we needed in fact was someone who would get under the basket and make a feint. As he took off someone would be ready to catch the ball, which would be thrown in disguise of a shot. The one who caught it must hand it to me fast. This plan of course contained heightened risk of getting fly-swatted, in addition to being presumptuous of the other team’s un-anxious defense. First, we weren’t sure if all or majority of the green team would storm at the guy who would do the fake. Second, if the guy got delayed, he would sure be charged with a five second violation. Lastly, if anyone from theother squad got wind of it and got me, I assuredly wouldn’t be able to make that shot. They would grab the rebound because our team was simply lesser in terms of offensive rebounds and thus, the possibility of them scoring again and snatching the lead would be enlarged and they would really take the lead for the first time in who knows how long…but for lack of a better idea, we opted to go on with the plan. Number 16 was assigned for the fake, Kazushi for the pass and me for the shot. Piece of cake it seemed like it, but far out in reality. So we executed the plan. The ball was delivered to me through bare success and dangerous passes. When it was my turn Toru charged at me. That wasn’t expected. There was nothing left to do but for me to do another fake. I aimed, not jumping and to my delight, he bought it! So I funneled again even as he landed. The ball flew from me; the crowd was further excited. I could hear the sound of the ball gunning through the air and with .18 second left with the game, the ball went it. It must have been the most amazing shot I have made in a few months. Then the buzzer rose up in the air. As I received congratulations, I felt that there was something dramatic about this victory. One thing was certain; either I was the best player, or Toru Hanagata who got 2 points more than me. As it turned out, however, it wouldn’t matter either way because both of us made it to the team. Plus, there’s a new challenge in store for us newcomers. We are going to face the basketball team tomorrow and guess what? They promised it wouldn’t be that easy.
TBC
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